Sometimes things happen. Things you cannot explain. Things that don’t even happen to you, but they impact you in an emotionally deep way. Things, life, it happens. These past two months have been the most incredible months for me on a very personal level… Marriage, family, planning for our future, dreaming about our home, celebrating month one and coming up upon month two. Things are good, really good. There is always the usual life happenings. Moments that trigger us, little fights, sassy kids and short fuses… But, life has been good.
I lost my words this month for a couple reasons… Life altering reasons. And it wasn’t my life that was altered. But, people who I hold dear to my heart… They were altered. In big ways. And big changes occurred in their lives. It didn’t feel right to write about simple things, things that make me happy and things that express how beautiful and wonderful life is when they were struggling so. The things… well that is their story to tell, but they were bigger than the average and definitely life altering.
I had to process and I had to understand what their journey meant to me. I wanted to support my people through mourning with/for them, I wanted to rescue them through their illness, I wanted to ensure the perfect house was theirs to buy. I wanted to rescue all of them and make their lives happy, easy, “normal” again. However, I understand their journey is theirs and theirs alone. And it is my job to be human, empathize, sympathize and love.
The journey of being an outsider looking on is nothing compared to the individual living the process. The emotions stirred within me is something all together new though. In years past I was able to watch, understand and sympathize without emotionally getting tangled in the web of emotion. These past two months I have cried tears for my friends and family, felt the emotion raw, been able to identify pain and anguish and sorrow and fear.
The bottom line for me… Life is precious. Watching my friends hearts mend, hearing about my friends miraculous recovery from her father, my faith in humanity and life cycles is stronger than ever. My understanding that life is precious has taken on a new meaning deep within. Though I am very short fused, when the fuse is burning, I now remind myself that life is precious. In one moment everything can change and those you love need to understand they are loved and cared for always. Everyday. No question.
To my dear friends and family… Thank you for being who you are. Those that were recently impacted, your grace, strength, courage and will inspire me and make me love you as part of my life more each day. Thank you for teaching me so much about being a strong woman.