Sentimental, yes I am.

Five years ago today I was 14 days away from becoming a mama. I was 14 days away from meeting my little world. I was 14 days away from Doodle’s long awaited and even longer arrival. Five years ago today I was in the emotional spiral between excitement and fear of becoming a mama for the first time.

The journey to motherhood is a long, emotional and physically enduring path to travel and I was and am ever so blessed to have been given this opportunity.

I cannot believe these photos were taken five years ago. Friends celebrating a friends birthday, a rare moment of pregnancy was captured. Looking back these are the only full body photos of me carrying Doodle except for a few random and rare moments in time – my baby shower, painting Doodle’s room and the three month bench mark, making it through the first trimester, and my itty bitty bump.

In hind sight I would have done it differently. I would have captured every single moment. I would have taken progress photos. I would have basked in the glory of my baby body. I had a challenging pregnancy; placenta previa impacted me for nearly the entire ten months. It caused water retention, rapid weight gain and it prevented me from living the active lifestyle I was used to. No jogging, no lifting anything heavier than 5lbs, nothing that elevated my heart rate or that was more active than a gentle stroll. As a result I hid, I hid from the camera and hid from the excitement of those ten moths.

Had I known then, what I know now, I would have never shied away from the camera. Had I known I would only ever be pregnant once, I wouldn’t have been self conscious in documenting the miracle. Had I known that I would crave memories of that time leading up to motherhood, I would have taken pictures and made videos.

Fourteen days from now I will have a 5 year old! I am so grateful for the blessing that this life has bestowed upon me. Motherhood may be the most magical gift I have ever been given. And Doodle may just be the most magical person I know. She is heaven in the form of a little human being full of spirit and sprite.

Thank you to my forever girlfriends for always showing me the beauty within myself. For hugging and loving on that HUGE baby body of mine and celebrating life with me. These photos popping up into my “memories” timeline this morning filled me with sentimentality and love.