My Wellness Journey : Fitness
Wellness: the state of being in good health, especially as an actively pursued goal.
I started this year with the goal to find my vibrance again. I knew the past couple of years had been tough emotionally and I knew I had lost something. Lost something within myself. Something that was part of the core of who I have been my whole life. It was my vibrance. The intrinsic joy I carry myself with and the simple way I see joy in life’s little details. It was missing, I was missing.
We’ve all been there. Maybe more than once. In a place where we feel as if we have lost ourselves to the world we live in. To the people we care for. To the career we chase. To the chores on our to do list. Working so hard to please so many, to chase so much, to accomplish the big picture; that I stopped worrying about myself. I stopped caring for my health. I stopped feeding my happy. It wasn’t one big moment, it was a lot of little moments that added up to one crushing realization, I had not only let myself go, I had let my happy go.
In recovering my vibrance, I realized the journey would become a long and dedicated process. Just as I didn’t lose it over night, I wasn’t going to regain it over night. And so a dedication to my vibrance became a priority.
At the start of June I felt I was behind in my goal to recapture my vibrance. And by behind, it felt like I hadn’t even really started. Yes, there were actions I had taken and the ball was rolling; getting back into reading personal development books, reading daily devotionals to become more connected with God, maintaining a health journal to watch my thyroid and keep a gratitude journal to truly focus on the good. I wasn’t completely off track, but there was so much more to accomplish and time was starting to run out.
As a result I knew I had to make a commitment to myself. Mentally I had locked in a routine that made my mornings more joyful, my spirit more peaceful and my heart more calm. Now it was time to focus on the stuff that was tough for me – fitness and nutrition.
I knew, based on past experience, that I could not start by going all in. I had to have something that was simple, a stepping stone. So on June 23rd I started by committing to 30 days of yoga. I had run a marathon, I had done intense HIIT workout programs, I had pushed my body to it’s limits and I just needed to recover for a bit. I needed to find joy in fitness again, because to me, all the hard work had not paid off. So, 30 days of yoga it was. Around the 20 day mark I started missing pushing myself harder, this was of no surprise to me. I like to sweat. I like to push myself. I like to feel the reward of adrenaline and endorphins that comes from a more intense workout. Luckily a new fitness program had been released in my BOD (Beachbody on Demand) app and I started planning my next step.
As my 30 days of yoga came to an end I had created a habit of making time for myself for 30 minutes a day and I was craving more. More fitness, more time focused on me, more progress. I liked how easy 30 minutes was to fit into my day, even on the days when I wasn’t feeling it. For some reason, not committing to those 30 minutes for myself felt like a betrayal and so pushing play became a fun challenge. Some nights my 30 minutes started at 8pm, but every day, something was accomplished.
No, I didn’t always feel motivated. I also didn’t always feel like I gave it my best. But, the challenge of 30 days had extended and somehow I managed to workout 50 days in a row. And then 65 days in a row. And then 78 days in a row.
I also found that a variety of fitness programs felt good. Mixing yoga with Beachbody’s LIIFT 4 (my favorite program they’ve created to date) and riding our Peloton (best anniversary gift ever) worked best for me. Again, the all-in fitness thing does’t work for me. Variety is my spice of life and I needed a way to create a routine that was not tied to one program, one gym or one style of fitness. By mixing it up, I made it happen.
Today is day 100! I am going to say that again … Today is workout 100, day 100 of my commitment to fitness to myself.
I no longer worry if I will fit a workout in today. I now only wonder when I get to complete my workout each day. I no longer have long stretches of focused fitness followed by even longer stretches of no fitness or activity at all. I now simply know I will find 30 minutes (maybe 40) each day to be active. Now that the seasons are kind of changing in AZ more outdoor play will occur too – hikes, bike rides, anything outdoors… I will seek and continue to accomplish 30 minutes of dedicated activity daily.
So here I am, closer to the vibrance I was seeking at the start of this year. Proud of the mental routines I have in place to ground myself and find my emotional happiness. I am beyond proud of the 100 days of activity I have accomplished. And I am excited that I now am ready and willing and excited to focus on my nutrition.
Are you stuck? So was I. Are you struggling to find the moment, the motivation, the ah ha steps that will lead to more activity and fitness? So was I… Here’s what I’ve learned so far…
- Stop wishing. For so long I was wishing for the motivation to get started. I was wishing for the answer of what to do next. I was wishing for life to simply change with no effort on my part. Wishing will get you nowhere.
- Start somewhere. I didn’t start with nutrition (my biggest challenge and I am just getting started here) or fitness (I love being active, but struggled finding my version of healthy and active), I started with something I was comfortable with. Reading and writing. I started mentally preparing myself with one routine that was easy for me. What is easy for you? Maybe being active is already so easy. Maybe eating healthy is something you do daily. Start with what is easiest for you, create consistency and then stair step into your goals. Creating and achieving a consistent mental routine made me realize that I could accomplish a new fitness routine and master my activity goals. Having accomplished 100 days of staying active has made me realize I can dedicate that same effort, create that same routine and develop a consistent and positive habit in regard to my nutrition.
- Tip toe into a new routine. I started my fitness routine be releasing all preconceived notions I had of fitness to date. I started over. I knew I felt that nothing was working, so instead of continuing to push forward in what felt like a dead end, I changed direction. I knew I liked yoga and had gotten out of the habit of including it in my routine. I went from intense to intentional and that made all the difference. I mentally about faced what I had been doing for years and it shocked my system into a new focus, new habit and consistency that I had been desperately seeking.
- Take one day at a time. I didn’t always want to. Nor did I always do my best. But, I always showed up. I always said yes when it came time to question myself when I was lacking motivation. Yes, I want to work out today. Yes, I want to keep my streak going. Yes, I feel better once I work out. Yes, I am going to accomplish my goal. Yes, I am going to prove to myself that I am worth it. Yes, I am going to say yes to me. Maybe working out every day is not a goal, that is 100% a-ok, but what are your goals? Say yes to your goals. By saying yes to myself for the past 100 days, I am now much better prepared to say yes to healthy eating decisions. I also now know I can accomplish any goal I set forth because I proved to myself I could these past 100 days.
- Stop comparing yourself to others! Everyone says it. And everyone is right in saying it. I was the queen of comparison for the longest time when it came to fitness. I wasn’t strong enough, thin enough, good enough, focused enough, getting the same results enough, etc… The list goes on… And it stopped me from being my best. I am now only concerned with my own goals and accomplishments. I am not you, you are not me, that is a-ok and I am going to do me.
No one, but me, can control this mental process for me. The same goes for you. Not a single person can make anyone of us feel inferior without our permission. Sure, others may try. People can try to prove their value by trying to diminish yours. Sure there will always be the people that try to one up others in this world by proving they know more, know better, do more, do better; let them have that. Let that be their journey. You are on this journey for yourself. You cannot control their chaos, but you can spot it, acknowledge it, ignore it and carry on anyway.
Anything is possible. What do you want to accomplish before the new year? We have 93 days to step into a new habit and create new positive and consistent behaviors. You’ve got this! Need any motivation or support at all? I am here. Email me, we are in this together! I will send you all the good juju you can handle!
KyOctober 1, 2018 at 6:16 pm
I love all of this.
I love that you found YOUR way and I love that list.
And this is just wonderful.
P.S. This really resonated: “We’ve all been there. Maybe more than once. In a place where we feel as if we have lost ourselves to the world we live in. To the people we care for. To the career we chase. To the chores on our to do list. Working so hard to please so many, to chase so much, to accomplish the big picture; that I stopped worrying about myself. I stopped caring for my health. I stopped feeding my happy. It wasn’t one big moment, it was a lot of little moments that added up to one crushing realization, I had not only let myself go, I had let my happy go.”
And, you look great!
MelanieOctober 1, 2018 at 11:42 pm
You are a true North Star in life’s journey and have always been an inspiration to me. You live in a manner that I strive to emulate. xo